Something I knew when I started this blog is that I'd get controversial feedback on it. People who are hesitant to hire me because they have proof that I'm clearly sick.
So, I'm sick. You're right. I have a tendency to be a little more sick than your "average" person. (As an aside, what's an average amount of sick time, anyway? I know people who never get sick, some who get sick just as much, if not more, than I do, and those who get sick anywhere from 2-5 weeks total throughout the year--why are we defining what a 'normal' amount of sickness is when we're all individual people with different immune systems? Okay, rant over.)
But you know what else is different about me? I work harder than that "average" person. I have no problem working more than 40 hours a week when things need to get done. I don't miss deadlines--I have never, in my 23 years of working on projects or anything working on, missed a deadline. I write from hospital beds, I edit from home--I get my things done and I do whatever I have to do to get things done.
I guess I'm feeling discouraged and held back because a lot of people read this and don't see what I'm trying to get across. I want to help people, and while yes, I have a story to tell and yes, I am sick a fair amount--why should that be what you define me by? I've written about how I'm different than the "normal" sick person. I work when I'm sick. I help people when I'm sick. I do what I have to do and I don't let my sickness define me, so why should you?
I'm starting a new program on Monday. It's called Take Shape for Life...it's a weight loss/life program. Since my journey with illness began, I've put on around 30-40 pounds, and really trying to lose that weight is the only thing I haven't tried in terms of really getting healthy again. I'll be eating more frequently than I'm used to (right now, I'm just eating some yogurt for breakfast and dinner, when I have an appetite--the medicine I was on is what made me gain the weight, I'm just struggling to lose it) and in a few weeks, I'll start an exercise regimen.
It's not that I'm trying to stay sick. I take my medicine, I take my antibiotics when I'm prescribed them, I listen to my body, and I do the best that I can--I don't want to be held back because someone reads this and thinks "this girl is too sick for my company."
But quite frankly, if you're reading this and thinking that I'm too sick to work for you, it's your loss.
I work hard, and I'd bet a lot of good money that the majority of your employees are hardly working. I know what I'm capable of, and if you're not willing to see what I see, I will take my talents and my passion elsewhere and your company can continue to be as-is without my talents.
That is your loss, and my gain. I won't let you hold me back. My illnesses are not a disability. My illnesses have made me a stronger person and more persistent than most. If you can't see that, and you're not willing to, then I don't need you in my life. I'm sorry if that's harsh, but that's just the way it goes with me.
Up next: Depression. My struggles, my reactions and how the public didn't support me
“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.”
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